Walking with Keith in 2010

"My eyes are dry. My faith is old. My heart is hard. My prayers are cold."

Have you ever felt this way? This morning as I was driving in to my office at World Indigenous Missions, this old Keith Green song was running through my mind. I think that as you go through life, serving God in ministry, desensitization and apathy can come at us in various forms. Of course we all face personal challenges and struggles and deal with family drama. And most of us (unfortunately) know what it's like to have a spiritual leader disappoint us or even break our heart. If we're not careful, though, these things can creep inside us and begin to cloud our vision of eternity. We can begin to feel like what we do doesn't really matter and become discouraged, bitter, withdrawn and complacent. And while these feelings may all be entirely justified, and feel like a warm blanket that we are perhaps entitled to snuggle in for a while, consider this sobering thought; complacent people don't pose much threat to the kingdom of darkness.

"and I know how I ought to be; alive to You and dead to me."

As I look forward to 2010, a big part of me is very glad 2009 is over. It was a challenging year...and not in a good way. I'm hoping 2010 will be easier, but the truth is, it may not. So, I'm starting the year the best way I know...by fasting and drawing near to God. Don't get me wrong. There were a lot of great things about 2009, and the truth is I'm thankful for the challenges as well. Without troubles, how would we grow? In fact, when viewed in light of eternity, they really only help me...they help me locate my own weaknesses and they help me rely more fully on God.

"So what can be done for an old heart like mine? Soften it up with oil and wine. The oil is You, your spirit of love. Please wash me anew with the wine of your blood."

Yes, Jesus, yes.

Thanks, Keith. I needed that. :)

Julie who?

I know, I know...I haven't posted in FOREVER! My problem is that I have difficulty with short postings. This short-coming (sorry) is one that I am determined to overcome. A friend posted a quote from William Shakespeare today that has inspired me. "Brevity is the soul of wit." If William is right, then perhaps my long-winded ramblings aren't nearly as clever as I think they are. So with that in mind, I herewith conclude this posting. :)

Crossing Bridges

So there I was, bike over body, lying in the rocky and mercifully dry creek bed. How I got there is a bit embarrassing, but for the benefit of all I will share.

I was doing a little mountain bike trail riding with some friends last Saturday. An innocent enough venture for someone who has ridden a bike as much as I have. But as I approached the little wooden bridge, I hesitated, lost my momentum, and, focusing on the side that I did NOT want to ride off of, proceeded to do exactly that! My friends heard a grunt of sorts and turned around to see a bike tire and a foot rising up from the gully below!

Do I just like to tell self-deprecating stories? No, not really. It was sometime afterward as I was nursing some very minor injuries that the teachable moment struck me and the lessons began to unfold.

1) Momentum lost through hesitation can be nearly impossible to recover.

As I rounded the curve in the trail that led to the bridge, I slowed...let's be honest. I stopped. I stopped and thought about it. I looked at the slight downward angle of the trail, the unevenness at the edge of the bridge, the obstacles on either side, the rocks, the fallen tree - WHAT IF I FALL OF THE BRIDGE!!?? When I tried to roll forward from my stand still, I lacked sufficient momentum to roll smoothly over the bridge and up the other side of the ravine. Momentum is an extremely valuable commodity. Without it, you may get the same job done, but you'll have to work twice as hard. Had I just kept riding, this story would never have happened.

2) Fear will defeat you every time.

When you focus on your obstacles they ALWAYS seem bigger than they truly are. Fear saps your confidence and causes you to perform at a level well below your abilities. Fear keeps your attention fixed on the problem, rather than the solution. Fear tells you the thing you don't want to happen will. It is the exact opposite of faith. You cannot give fear a dwelling place in your soul and expect to make progress.

3) We will move toward whatever we focus on.

As I moved slowly and cautiously forward I did exactly what I knew NOT to do. Instead of looking toward my desired destination, I focused on the thing I hoped to avoid, thus propelling myself in that very direction. Your life will move in the direction of your most dominant thought. If you have a dream, a goal, a vision - a place you hope to be - begin to fix your focus on that instead of all the reasons it can't be done. With your gaze fixed, you will see that dream more and more clearly with each passing day, week, month...just watch.

If you will learn from my mistakes, I pray that you will find yourself crossing new bridges to exciting places rather than riding off the edges of them. Trust me, it's much more fun!